Marriage is not Hard

Marriage is not something that has happened to me. It is not what I am, or who I am. It is not something that defines or confines you. It is not attached to stereotypical perceptions portrayed in magazines or movies. It is not an unbalanced power struggle. It is not craving time apart because you’re tired of spending time together.

Marriage is not hard.

It’s this wonderful union of two vibrantly creative and expansive minds. It’s this inexpressible contentment with spending your full days together. It’s being able to fully support one another during our moments of great stride, and courageous leaps in life, or business. It’s having this infinite well of strength and courage, long after I’ve exhausted the resource within myself.

Yes, being human can be hard at times. Yes, moving in with another person can take some getting used to. Yes, learning to grow alongside of someone both fixated on your individual strides, as well as the intricate lacing of your growth together can, at times, be challenging. Yes, being able to adapt to making decisions together, could maybe at times become tough. But those aren’t the conditions that should be attached to marriage, those are simply the conditions that can be attached to what it means to be human.

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Marriage will not change the beautifully knitted relationship that you’ve woven together thus far. Marriage will not change who you are as human beings. Marriage will not cause you to miss out on the life that you love to live. Marriage will not compromise your growth.

Choosing to get married is, in my opinion, a wondrously beautiful celebration of choosing to hold the hand of your partner for the entirety of your life; not because society says that you have to, or because you feel like it’s something you should do, but rather because you feel so whole-heartedly, and comfortably at home, when you are together.

Getting married is an incredible celebration of bringing two hearts together--either in the presence of one another, or surrounded by family and friends--because realizing that you’re better together than you are apart--with or without the legal ceremony of marriage--deserves to be celebrated.

Whether you are both physically at home, or across the Atlantic ocean together. Whether you are wrapped up in your own bed, or asleep on the gravel floor of a campground. Whether it remains the two of you till the end of your time, or includes a handful of tiny feet running about. Whether you are both jobless, or entirely supported with your careers. Choosing to get married allows you to realize that out of all the decisions that you have ever made--whether grandiose and well thought out, or minute and spontaneous--have led you here, to this moment, home in the heart of one another.